As I’ve said in an earlier post on my other blog, Nathan and I are in the midst of moving into our first house. It’s a little unnerving for a number of reasons:
- It’s our first house. We’re now homeowners, and that comes with a lot of responsibility.
- Our first house is also intended to be a living community. We’ll be living with others not to just have housemates, but to learn how to develop community within the house and within our neighborhood. Fostering authentic community is messy. It takes time, extra love, and it’s not always easy or fun.
- We’re living in the city – not in the heart of downtown (not many residential places there anyway), but we definitely chose to live in a non-suburban, not-so-great economical neighborhood. This of course, has implications. As to what those will be and what will happen while we live here, I have no clue. I have lived a mostly sheltered life so far, and while I’d always like to believe that I can handle the crazies and the unexpected of an un-sheltered life, I know the way I respond may be much different and probably much worse than I idealize.
It’s also exciting for a number of reasons:
- We have a house. And I love it. I am extremely grateful for Nathan putting all the hard work together and crunching the numbers and figuring out all the details of getting the house. I am grateful that we are not indebted to a bank. I am grateful that the house is in pretty good condition and doesn’t require a ton of work.
- I’m in charge of decorating! I love the space and all its potential. I thrive on the possibilities and ideas for creativity, beauty, and coziness to welcome others into our home like it is their own. It’s ours and we can do what we want with it.
- Living with friends or people who could become friends can be fun! For a typical introvert like me, it can sound draining just thinking about living with lots of people around all the time. At the same time, for a typical introvert like me, it can be easy to spend too much time by yourself and not get enough healthy people time, especially if you’re relatively new to the area or are still adjusting to post-grad life (read as: life as a real adult). So living with others can help increase community, accountability, and better communication skills, while decreasing loneliness, unhealthy habits, and selfish, me-centered perspectives.
But now that the house belongs to us and we’ve started cleaning, moving things in (slowly), and getting things settled, we’ve hit that point in transitions that I usually dislike the most: it’s that we-know-where-we’re-going-but-we’re-not-quite-settled-yet phase. This can be read as: I like closure and we do not have closure yet. Here are some examples of these manifestations:
- There were a number of times where Nathan and I went to the new house but forgot the keys and had to go back to the apartment to get them.
- The dishwasher is not installed (insert an ‘oh-my-gosh-I-can’t-believe-I-have-a-dishwasher-I’ve-always-washed-dishes-by-hand’ giggle) . It is sitting wrapped up in our kitchen.
- We don’t have much food left. And what little food we had we moved to the house fridge because we had to unplug the apartment one for a night because it’s not working so well. There were many mealtimes where I’d say to myself, “Oh, I could just make this for lunch,” only to realize that I left those ingredients at the house.
- I have many ideas for decorating the house, but I know I can’t do them all at once. It’ll have to be a slow process. Like, all our walls are white right now. It could be worse, but I’d like to paint them at some point. Unfortunately, I have no idea what to paint them because I haven’t lived there yet.
Hopefully, by Saturday when we move all the major furniture, get the internet set up, and we start living primarily from our new home, things will be different.